dude stuff fucking sucks. i don’t understand how the people around me expect me to keep being okay. i haven’t seen anyone except my family for a year, my friends have stopped talking to me and i’m to overwhelmed by anxiety to try and meet people online. i’ve been moved from online school to online school and can’t find the motivation anywhere in me to do anything. at this point i don’t care what happens to me. i never cared about my future in the first place, i was never able to imagine that i would live that long. not by killing myself, i just couldn’t imagine the universe had or has any reason to keep me alive. but i’m still here so i continue my cycle of lying around and upsetting my family and taking up space.
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