trauma dump #2

my sisters birthday party alot of family was there, including in laws, it was great until it wasnt. everyone started fighting, physically and verbally. they took it oustide and i was left inside with my my 1/2 year old nephew. he was screaming and crying and i was trying my best to calm him down, but it was just so loud. the yelling, the fighting, it wouldnt stop. my sister in law punched my other pregnant sister in law in the stomach. someone stabbed my brother in the stomach, right in our backyard. still dont know who did that. it went on until someone called the cops. i didnt understand why anyone was even fighting, but it will forever be a memory i fail to suppress no matter how hard i try. i cry everytime someone yells at me because of that day. my ears are constantly ringing because of it, and even the slightest loud noise makes it worse. i rarely listen to music now because the ringing. rarely does the ringing ever stop. i dont remeber the exact age i was but it was about, 8-10 years ago.