i love him. he’s using me for my body but i don’t care. i had a panic attack once i found out that he was hooking up with someone else. but i still care deeply for him. why does reality feel like a hallucination? am i dreaming? i can’t tell what’s real, what’s fake. i feel sick thinking about him. i want to throw up. i want to faint. my stomach hurts and i feel dizzy. i just want to feel loved even if he just uses me. ive never felt so loved. i don’t want him to leave. ever. i love you.
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