Lately, my head has been going in circles more then it usually does. You see I have found myself deep in a hole, its like I climb out of it just enough to where I can finally see the light. Then I am shoved straight back into it and somebody is taking a shovel and barring me deep in the hole. I do not know why I feel this way but I do, I feel stuck in life. Like it has no direction, like I have no idea what I am doing. I mean I am young and I am at a time where I can make my own decisions but those decisions are becoming more real and have more of an impact on those who are around me. I look at myself and I am honestly disgusted by what I see. I am so tired all the time, I feel like all I do is sleep. Even when I am around people and I am laughing on the inside I am dying. I am hurting, no matter how hard I try to force myself to be happy I just can not see to actually feel that way. It just all ends up being fake. I am not gonna lie I really just wanna go to sleep and not wake up for a little while sometimes. FUCK!

1 year ago

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