I was carrying my sad excuse of an athlete home after a grueling day. I was defeated by a larger opponent with similar skill level. I really shouldnt be so hard on myself but I always have. I feel it's the only way to obtain the spirit of a warrior. It's all I really want at this point in my life. Forget the money, legacy and whatever else people endure their suffering for. I cried a bit truth be told. I sacrificed so much for this. I'm an older dog with dog blood in my veins. I have to squeeze all of it out. At the very least as much of it as I can. I've grown so familiar with pain and hate. Ironic in so many ways. Hate is where we turn when we cant face the pain we feel inside. Everyone looks at me so strangely nowadays and rightfully so I think. I feel the same.

1 year ago

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