Im the type to put on a happy face and have good/positive vibes in public but once i get home, Im depressed asf. I have so much going on in my head and in my family but i do not say anything. I have people i can vent to but i don't want them to feel like they have to listen to my problems and i would just feel like im buggin them with my problems so i literally just come home and cry until i fall asleep almost every night. Im 23 and i stay with my older sister and help watch her kids while her and her husband go to work. Mind you i been doing this for almost 10 years. Even when i was going to school, i would come home and watch their kids. I dont work and i dont make money at all. Its kinda rare for them to give me any type of money but i dont expect them to because how theyre family but at times i feel like theyre just taking advantage of me staying with their kids because how im not married and because im staying with them. theyll come home and expect me to keep watching their kids. Im still young and have alot to do with my life but i know if i move out, theyll think im being ungrateful. Its just how their mindset is set. i dont know but im tired of feeling like this but i dont want them to feel some type of way towards me if i just leave.
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