12 is where it all ends....well at least for me... I don't know what to do anymore I lay down thinking eveynight on how I would not see my mom how much I use to I try to stay quiet bc I don't want anyone to heat when I cry I remember all the jokes I made with my mom then I cry myself to sleep. I feel so alone even tho I have everyone on my side but I get to the point where I'm going to tell my mom how I feel but then I think on how many times I joked about being depressed in life but then I think that what if I really do have depression??? Every night I lay in bed and feel tears go down. My neck and snot plug my nose.... thinking of all the ways I could have run away from my life but I think of killing my self and hurting myself but I can't bc I know they all care if I were to hurt my self or kill my bff would do the same and my mom would end up the same way they would all end up like me.... What do I do? Who will I tell...?
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