At this point, I'm apart of a family that has stopped trying. I've tried for so long and they never saw it or understood anything. I try to fix things by just being myself and i get looked at with the expression of cringe and irritation. Every time when Me and my sister do wrong and I start feeling guilty, despite my parents never really cared about my mental health or anything but school and keeping us under their boot, I feel like I'm just playin the victim and that my parents are the victim of my existence, my mistakes and my tiredness. Everything truly sucks and I feel worse bc how could I let my parents become so detached when they have a young son to look after. Everything in my life has been either ppl harassing me and abusing me or my fault. I'm sorry I just can't do this. I really want to put a pause on my life.
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