I regret everything. so there was this boy in highschool, lets call him Tony, and lets say I believe Tony is my soulmate. Me and Tony met in our theater class, it was my sophomore year and it was his freshman year (weird I know but he was born late so he was my age). I was the quiet girl in class who didnt talk to anyone and he was relatively social (at least from what I remember). We had a play coming up (Alice in wonderland) and I volunteered to work the sound board since nobody else wanted to, really I just volunteered so I can fuck around in the box, anyways ! Tony and his friend (who is also coincidentally named Tony) volunteered to work the spot lights that were also up in the box. This is where it all began. On the days that were up there Tony and I never really spoke (since again I am very socially awkward) and I would usually talk to my friend who worked the light board. One day when my light board friend was gone from school Tony volunteered to work the light board for her and put in all the light boards. We began talking that day since I also knew how to also work the light board somewhat and was told to show him the basics. The conversation was short but It felt nice. that dy after school we had a rehearsal and the other Tony had to skip out since he had a soccer game, which meant that it was just me and Tony #1 up in the box. He started out by standing behind me while I was working on the sound board which scared me. He began to laugh and he apologized for doing so. After that day me and Tony began talking more frequently, it escalated to a friendship and then we began flirting here and there. I have never felt anything as amazing as I did with him. Me and him were like connected at the head, we had the same type of humor and everytime we talked it never got boring. we began dating during the summer and it was great...however when school started I began ignoring him. I was so afraid of what my friends would think of him seeing as how he was pretty short and super skinny. as soon as I saw the judgemental look from my friends face when they saw him I immediately began to act cold towards him. I even broke up with him because of it. However after a couple months we began being friends again (I still didnt let my friends know). while we were friends me and him had sex for the first time then soon after got back together..big mistake ! he went and told everyone and soon it got back to me. I panicked obviously and denied it all. Tony and I got into a big fight and we stopped talking again. months go by and I start dating someone new and so does he. However everytime I would see him out in the hallway we'd lock eyes and I couldnt help but feel overwhelming sadness. After a while I break up with my boyfriend and me and Tony become friends again. He soon leaves his girlfriend and me and him start a fling again. We dont date but there is just something about him that has me hooked. I feel like I can truly be myself around him so letting him leave my life was really hard. Tony and I stay friends and I start dating someone new. Im not gonna lie I still had feelings for Tony and I let him know that regardless of who im with itll always be him who has my heart. Things end nasty nd he ends up telling my boyfriends bestfriend that me and him had sex (this is not true this time, I never cheated on my boyfriend with Tony). I get upset and I completely cut him off. Thats the end of the story...Ive never gottn over Tony and to this day I still check his socials to see how he is. He has a girlfriend now and shes beautiful and smart. they look good together and im happy for them. I just wish I had the courage to apologize to him for everything I did and didnt say, for the way I treated him, how I look for him in every person I date. Anyways... If he ever finds this and is wondering if hes the person im talking about...You ever had a fucking hotdog ?

1 year ago

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