Me and Adir used to joke about a story we heard from Raphi, he lived on the border. He saw from the second to last war our brothers waiting to go in, the tension he heard their words, me and Adir used to joke with each other "hurry up and shoot mother fucker", I couldn't imagine waiting on the border for someone to shoot at me first. Its not so funny anymore actually its tragic. Like when the person you trust your heart with with does it to you. The emotions and affection get withdrawn, and you hold on and hope your just having a bad few days. Would you wait for them to break it off? Would you allow yourself to be dragged through that? I didn't and it still hurts. Though maybe I was getting played the whole time, I'll never know. It doesn't matter. Just this hole in my chest and my mind obsessed. My soul will live but this pain wont. It will go away with everything else. I home your happy
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