So im a lesbian and recently I’ve been messing around with a guy since I’m homoflexible. (I’m not attracted to him at all) but I’ve been doing some things I’ve never done with him for the first time and whenever I feel like I’m doing something bad or that I’m not supposed to, I feel super guilty and have to tell my sister. However, if I tell her, she will be very disappointed since she told me not to mess with him (he used to like me and she doesn’t want me hurting his feelings) and she also doesn’t want me doing anything “spicy” since I’m young, and haven’t found the right person. (I don’t plan on going far with this guy and have boundaries in place that he’s respectful of) but I feel the need to tell my sister. It’s not ok for me to tell her everything though because she won’t always be around for me to tell her and I need to learn to keep things to myself, but if I don’t, it eats away at me and gives me tons of horrible anxiety. Another thing is my best friend also doesn’t like me messing with him. She says she has a bad feeling about him but they don’t know each other and I’ve known him for 3 years now so I trust him. I just feel bad whenever I tell her me and him messed around and she doesn’t even know what we did but I can see the disappointment on her face and she’s super dismissive when I bring it up. I ask her if she’s mad or disappointed but she always just says that it’s nothing, so I try not to bring it up as to not upset her. I think that maybe if I got reassurance from some sort of confessions site, then I’d feel better but from previous attempts, it doesn’t work and I tell my sister anyways. I can’t get rid of the bad feeling though and I don’t want to snap and just tell her so I’m trying my luck again with this site.

2 years ago

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