After reading some of the expressions here almost everyone has the same outlook. Life. It hurts. It’s pointless. We go round doing the same thing day out. You’ve probably heard it all before but I really do want to end my life. The same old cliche of nothing keeping me here. But it’s true. At 39 years of age I have no friends, no children no relationships. So much pain and heartache over the years. I’ve been used and abused . I’ve been good for those when it suits them and when no longer needed forgotten about. I go days without speaking to anyone. The only time family hear from me mostly is if I go and see them. So I’ve pulled back. Will be easier for when the time comes. I’ve never had a friend over for dinner or take out or movie night. I sit in listen to the tick tock of the clock that relentlessly tells me of my routine that I do not enjoy. The sleeplessness nights and no dreams haunt me and I’m on autopilot trying to get through the day. It’s like I’ve changed the batteries in the clock that Simmons me my time is near. Ive started clearing out my house, I’ve instructed a solicitor to prepare my Will. I’ve set the date. I know I’ll leave a trail of complications and devastation but why should death be complicated? I just want to have peace.

2 years ago

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