I have RSD, Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. Though, the only time it really shows is with my original stories. It's hard for me to tell my stories to people because I've had too many instances of people not being interested, or just not listening. I've tried. It happens in general, too. Not just with my friends, but my family too. To be honest, they probably just don't mean to affect me, but I really just can't help it. Then again, when I would try to tell my dad about them, he would tell me that he didn't want to read it until it was written down and ready to publish and that was a punch to my people-pleaser gut. My older brother would always criticize what I had already fixed or established just because he didn't like it, and my two younger siblings got tired of hearing me rant about them. I'm trying to just not speak up so I don't get ignored, but my mouth goes before I can stop it and I'm talking, risking being ignored again. In conclusion, I just want someone I can text/call at any time and talk to them about my stories, but, one can only dream. Feeling lonely and tired. I think I will nap.

1 year ago

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